For this assignment, we were to create a literal self portrait (how we see ourselves literally) and then a symbolic self portrait (how we see ourselves creatively)
I really struggled with this concept at first – how would I pose, literally? What clothes should I wear? Should I be doing something? What should I do? What am I, literally? After much self-reflection, I settled on a bold idea. I would portray the MOST literal image of myself. Nude.
Devoid of life – no soul – a “meat bag”
Laying on the ground
Shot from above, powerless
Why not cover up? Why cover up? I’m “not there” so to speak – it’s an image of nothing, no soul
Death
After more thought, the image told me other things
All my fear
Vulnerability
Awkwardness (I’m not a poser, not natural in front of the camera)
Situation was awkward
No “filters” – total exposure of WHAT I am – a simple physiological machine
A stick figure
No protection, no imagination, total transparency
I captured this moment of total transparency, total vulnerability, total exposure…I can now move on, acknowledging, compartmentalizing and rationalizing my fear of exposure.
Symbolic: Connected shapes of what I love in the world:
Natural and man-made beautiful structures and patterns
The city of Tampa, a “big Town” with a small town feel
The thriving niche markets (micro-brews example) and all people following their goals
All things connected to many other things, both natural and man-made
The title of this work is “Fear and Love”
The first photo is a culmination of all my fear, captured and recorded, to move on from
The second photo is a small picture of all I love, to build upon that naked fear that lies below it. The fear is still there, but recognized and dealt with.
We ALL are driven by those two basic emotions – fear and love. We mostly spend our time in a place of fear. If we can get to that place, capture it, examine it and rationalize it, we can move on.
Unless you get to that place of fear, you cannot see the world through the lens of love. When you can approach everything from a position of love first, all life, everything you do and all the relationships you have with those around you becomes so much easier. Only then can you pursue the goals that really make you happy.
The first photo (Fear) was shot using a “Lensbaby” camera lens. The Lensbaby is manual focus, manual aperture, with a physically moveable blur effect. The show was intentionally blurry – minor Gaussian blur using Photoshop to make the image “Internet friendly.”
The second photo is a collage of several images – a large Mangrove tree, Tampa skyline, the downtown Tampa railroad bridge, Mr. Jonathan Huber playing keys and images from DeBine Brewing Company in Dunedin, FL. The lowermost hexagon is the very first black & white film photo taken for this class – completely by accident.
Fear
Love
